Celebrating Life

Blogger: Sash

I hope this week’s Blog will inspire us to take the time to ask the elders around us what life was like when they were growing up. I’m sure the Millennials, Gen Z, Gen Alpha would love to hear about the ‘olden days’. :)

Today mum turns 80! So what was life like for the ‘silent generation’? Those born from 1925 – 1945 so called because they were raised during a period of war and economic depression.

How did they ‘survive’ with no TV, no mobile phone, no car, no washing machine, no microwave, no stove, no electricity?

In those days not everybody had access to the landline. When there was an emergency or someone passed on they had to physically go from home to home to spread the news. Imagine that…

Community

I’ll start off with what mum mentioned towards the end of our conversation. After we spoke about all that I mention below she was silent for a while.

She then said 'what we had then that we don’t have now is time'. I let that sink in for a minute. You would think that she would covet the fact that there’s technology now that wasn’t there then. Or electricity. Or she would mull about how tough things were compared to now. But no. TIME. She continued. 'We spent hours talking until late at night, all the community gathered around. Everyone was family whether related by blood or not. Everyone helped one another'. Community and Fellowship…

Early life

Mum was born in South Africa in 1940, during World War II, and was the 2nd of 8 children.

She started school at age 7. They could not afford to buy their school uniform so her mum bought material and sewed the clothes by hand. The dress code was very strict; girls with long hair had to have it braided in 2 plaits tied in a ribbon.

School was 5km (or 3 miles) away and commenced at 8am and concluded at 3pm. There was no access to a bus/car so she walked to school with her siblings. The round trip was around 2hours. She grew up during Apartheid when everything (schools, markets, beaches etc) were segregated. This meant that schools were based on race so she went to an ‘Indian’ school.

Toys were a luxury in those days and there was no TV until the 1970’s.

Entertainment was in playing games like hopscotch, rounders and 3 tins (similar to bowling), snakes and ladders. Competitive sports at school included tourniquet, netball and track running. Mum was so excited to narrate how she was the top athlete in track running and loved netball.

Homework was done at night using lanterns. Mum was so smart she skipped Year 4 and went straight from Year 3 to 5. The final year of school was at age 14 (equivalent to Year 9 today).

Home Life

Aside from cooking and chores, she spent most of her time gardening on the family farm and became an expert in planting carrots, tomatoes, green beans.

The men used to carry wood home from the match factory. At night, the wood was chopped (even by the women). Cooking was done over an open fire and later on paraffin or coal stoves before electric stoves were available.

They did not have water readily available and had to walk for miles to get it from the river which was boiled and used to bathe. Drinking water was available in drums from a communal area close to home.

There was no washing machine so the clothes were taken to the local river and washed.

Mum’s favourite past times was listening to the radio, reading, baking, sewing and music. Like every teenager, she had her favourite singers....Cliff Richard, Kenny Rogers. Jim Reeves and Elvis Presley. She did not have access to many books and wasn’t able to afford to buy the newspaper. She used to eagerly wait for the newspaper her brother brought home after work.

Reading remains one of her favourite pastimes especially books on health and the Reader's Digest. Ask anyone in our family and they will tell you the powerful effects of apple cider vinegar and lemon...courtesy of mum!

Marriage

Mum was married at age 23 (1964) in a lavish wedding with over 1,000 guests. It was an arranged marriage which meant the parents decided. There was no courtship and she went from single to married within 5 months. She remembers the dates! On 3 November 1963 the groom’s family came to say ‘Hello’. On 5th Jan 1964 they came to say they were interested in Mum for Dad. On 9 February 1964 they were engaged and on 26 April 1964 they were married. They simply put up a marquee in the Groom’s home, performed the ceremony and had plenty of food to eat. They were married for 27 years until Dad passed away.

In those days there was no honeymoon. After the wedding, the bride remained in the groom’s home and life began. It’s not like today where the couple starts out on their own. In those days you lived with the whole family. In mum's case that included 3 brother in laws, 1 sister in law, parent’s in law, parent’s in laws parents…the list goes on.

If my hands could talk

Mum always says that if her hands could talk they would tell many stories! The men were farmers so normally would start work very early. Mum would be up at 4am cooking at least 4 meals for breakfast, lunch, afternoon tea and dinner. In between, it was chores and helping out on the farm.

Shopping was done by the men with transport being the horse and cart. You didn't give them a shopping list, you just had to make do with what the men bought!

In 1970, mum was one of the very first women to get her heavy duty driver's licence. She used to drive the truck and tractor.

Between 1965 and 1977 my parents were blessed with 5 children. In those days, there were no diapers only cloth nappies and they could only afford to buy a few sets of clothes which was washed daily and re-used. Today the family has grown with 5 grand children and 1 great grandchild.

In 1977, the family land was purchased by the council. So after 13 years of being with the extended family they ventured on their own.

Farm in S. Africa (Mint crop)

Dad purchased a 10 acre piece of land (mainly bushland). He planted sugar cane to earn some immediate cash whilst tilling the land to plant vegetables. Vegetables included green beans, parsley, spring onions, mint, thyme, white carrot, Chinese cabbage etc.

The primary way to sell was in the local markets and through word of mouth. I remember them working until the early hours of the morning and then going to the markets to sell the produce. We still have the farm today and one customer that has been with us for 3 generations!

The Sacrifice

The one thing I remember about both my parents is not only the sacrifices they made but their determination. Their determination to make sure that their children were well educated and did not have the same struggles as them.

Dad never went to school. But he had the business acumen, the zeal and vision to turn a piece of bushland, at age 47, into land that yielded crops year after year. He made sure that what he planted was relevant in the ever changing economy.

Both our parents worked very hard and were not afraid to try new things. They knew wealth but remained frugal and were marked by a life of giving and helping others.

The Fighter

When mum was 70 years old, the dreaded ‘C’ word struck. She had 25 doses of radio therapy, 1 dose of chemotherapy and was on tablets for 5 years. One thing she did during that difficult time was remain positive. She is a fighter and a cancer survivor. :)

The Legacy

Mum shared proverbs with us like 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop'. Mum’s motto is ‘Where there’s a will, there’s a way’ and ‘Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today’. Which I used to respond with ‘Why do today what you can alway’s do tomorrow?’. Ha ha.

But in all seriousness, our parents did not teach us in lectures but in the lives they lived. We learned hard work, dedication, sacrifice and resilience. They taught us to be grounded, yet gave us wings to fly.

They taught us that one stick is easy to break but a whole bunch of sticks is difficult to break. So if we stick together like a bunch of sticks we will be okay.

Our elders past and present have a story to tell. This was a generation that just got on with life making the most with what they had. They were hopeful in spite of the circumstances and never gave up. They enjoyed the simple things….

May we learn from their wisdom. May we go back to making time for the things that matter…community and fellowship.

I’d love to hear your stories. Perhaps your parents were born during the greatest generation or later. I’d be delighted to share their story on this Blog. Do get in touch.

Please like and share this post....I'm sure there's at least one person in your circle who will be encouraged :)

Your fellow Rookie Parent,

Sash

I am an Accountant, Author and Blogger. Home is Australia with my husband, 4 year old son and Mum.

I believe that in sharing we grow.  And that's how this website and blog was born focusing on children and parents. It sure does take a village to raise a family and build a home.

It's so easy to forget 'you' on this journey. This website's here to remind you not to!